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Just Another Summer on Wall Street

15 | By Shah Gilani

Another week goes by on Wall Street, and it was a quiet one. For summer, that is.

And thank goodness. All the scandals, all the negative news, all the time, always something. I’m getting tired of writing so much.

It’s my summer too, you know.

So, when my extraordinary good fortune led me into the company of a spectacular woman this past week, I escaped the Street reality, enjoyed the beach, the Hamptons… and did I mention a spectacular woman?

My only problem going to bed last night was, what was I going to write about this morning?

Then, of course, I woke up. And reality hit me.

Just because I was out of touch (from reality) last week doesn’t mean the surreal wasn’t spilling out all over the Street.

Okay, so it was little stuff, but it’s still stuff.

Like finding out that Vikram Pandit, CEO of that little banking outfit Citigroup, got paid more last year than the bank paid in taxes.

That’s news you ask? No. Granted, we know that all those poor banks that suffered deep losses on account of a lot of sore-loser homebuyers who got the Street mantra wrong (it’s “buy high, sell low,” right?) won’t have big tax bills for a while because they saddled the good-guy banks with huge tax loss carry-forwards.

Besides, Vik (can I call you that?) deserves it. Can you imagine all the negative press he gets? He deserves more; I say give it to him and the other banksters who have to work so hard to keep their jobs while their firms don’t have to work nearly as hard to not pay taxes.

And then I heard that Jon Corzine was thinking about yet another career move. Yeah, that Jon Corzine. He, the former CEO of Goldman Sachs, former senator and former governor of New Jersey, former head honcho at some sad outfit that sadly didn’t make it after paying him $8 million last year… what’s that company’s name? Oh yeah, MF Global.

I don’t remember what the MF stands for, but I think the firm’s old customers know.

Well, J.C. (can I call you that?) thinks he’s similar to that other J.C. fellow, and can walk on water too. He wants to maybe start a hedge fund.

I’d trust him. After all, he was a U.S. senator, you know. A man of the people. I hope he does it. I have some loose change I’d throw him. Why not? He runs a loose show and knows how to change people’s lives. (Just ask his customers, who know what MF stands for.)

Yeah, like I said, it was a slow news week on the Street.

Wait, I almost forgot. That’s because it’s not news. Some bank somewhere is always “settling” with some idiot regulator who just wants to make his own career moves, or wants to fill the coffers of his own loose regulatory body’s cavity.

Apparently, and I know you’re going to just yawn, another bank was caught in a regulatory vice and had a fine extorted from it for doing nothing wrong.

Oh, the humanity! Will these poor banks ever be left alone to go back to doing J.C.’s work?

Standard Chartered, a little outfit (NOT) that was just keeping up good customer relations, had the unfortunate bad luck of getting caught naked.

Well, not exactly naked, not in the way you’re thinking. Naked as in the “wire stripping” transactions it was processing for our closest ally (at least it used to be) in the Middle East, Iran.

I know, it’s no big deal. They hid the fact that they were doing business through New York for Iranian businesses and maybe some “organizations.” So what.

I mean, so what, they got caught. They ended up paying (I mean settling) a small fine (tip money, really) of $340 million to yet another regulatory extortionist ring.

I feel sorry for them. Why? Because now that their nakedness has been exposed, they’re being sued by the estate of the U.S. marines killed in Lebanon in 1983.

What? Yeah, it appears that some lawyers think that the innocent bank (they never admit or deny, so they’re innocent, you know), because it may have facilitated some interests inimical to the U.S., could have been responsible for that former ally not making good on a judgment rendered against it by a federal court in Washington, demanding it pay the Marines’ families and estates some $2.6 billion.

Anyway, you’re probably scratching your head and saying to yourself, “Boy, Shah must be desperate to find anything newsworthy this week, he’s bringing up stuff from 1983!”

Sorry, that’s what happens in the summer on Wall Street. There’s nothing new. It’s always the same.

Shah

15 Responses to Just Another Summer on Wall Street

  1. Dave F says:

    Shah

    I encourage you and our fellow readers to read the book The Creature From Jekyll Island. It’s about the Federal Reserve. Boring (yawn), hardly. This is the most eye opening book I’ve read in several years. You’ll never look at this country the same way again. Highly recommended.

    • maria says:

      do you invest with Shah? I have been reading him for over 2 years really respect him and his correct cinism, but never until now had the guts to invest with him as I do not know him personally. I am looking for real people who invest with him. I have the proof he was right more than once certainly on Facebook super flop and much more… pls. email back if you invest with Shah, thank you maria

  2. Tas says:

    Hey Shah,
    Do you find that you have a couple friends that you can carry on a completely, 100% sarcastic conversation with one of them and everyone else around you thinks youve lost your mind? I think you would fit right in with us. lol

  3. Joseph p bell says:

    Good work ,Shah : I remember Reagan all too well . You can enlighten the amerikan populace anytime . Brings back memories of the USS LIBERTY and johnson from Texass

  4. Jay Curtis, author of THE CODE says:

    And yet voters put up with it, a congress paid for, an SEC that collects pennies in fines, a Justice Department that prosecutes no one. I wonder if bankers even get traffic tickets. Are they immune to those as well?

    Why, Shaw do you even bother to write anything. Its so futile as nothing said or done or proven by you or others ends in anything changing.

    Worse, why the F*** do I write this or any of the other comments I spat on this site and others. My first writing love is fiction, but what I write pales in comparison to the reality that is our nation right now.

  5. RUSS SMITH says:

    Hi!, Patrons Of Wall Street Insights & Indictments Et Al:

    Here’s some noteworthy news maybe but always do your own due diligence. Most analysts are saying gold is readying itself for a usual fall breakout to the upside but Larry Edelson, who’se watching Wall Street all year@ Uncommon Wisdom, tells us that gold is readying itself for a huge move to the downside, to kick to the sidelines the weak sisters first & then head higher above $2,000/troy oz. plus he forsees the Dow Jones eventually exceeding 21,000 but not yet. How does Larry see so much that Shah doesn’t see isn’t apparent to me but how about you? That’s what makes a market though folks; it’s calls bulls vs. bears or is it bears vs. bulls? Well, whichever it is Mr. Market will be the one to tell US the final word huh? Don’t forget to vote only for the winning candidate on November 6th this year, because next year, when they take office, it will be too late to vote for the winner which either one will be, because, as the Kome Of Zurick was overheard again saying: “That’s the sign of the establishmnt; they’re in office & no matter who wins the elections.” The Knome’s name is Hans, Alexander, Exavier, Bear and he loves paper money too. He told a lady this one day at a dinner party and she believed him up until even today. She just lives & breathes fiat, paper, I Owe You Nothing, money.

    RUSS SMITH, CALIFORNIA
    resmith@wcisp.com

  6. Marlene says:

    Pity the poor Citicorp investors who got stuck with a reverse spit 1 for 10, saw their shares turned to almost nothing and got a whopping $.01 a share dividend. when it had been $.54 a share in 2007. thank you Mr. CEO you got yours and you really gave to the investors right where the sun doesn’t shine…..

  7. ROBERT says:

    This is important, although hardly new. It’s simple reporting of the daily work of Wall St. and the and the banksters patiently hacking away at destroying our country.
    Nothing illustrates this better than a photo in The Tampa Bay Times a few days ago. The photo was of a mounted policeman in modern armor on a similarly protected horse, practicing for crowd control around the upcoming RNC convention. We can’t have the serfs demonstrating where it might disturb the lords, can we.

  8. Edouard D'Orange says:

    Even in a “slow” week, Shah finds such brazen crookedness to parody that it boggles the mind. Vikram Pandit, really, talk about taking the money for a job well done. Jon Corzine back in business, has he no shame?

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